S and I shared a sandwich and apples for lunch. She is an elementary teacher now, about to start her family, but I swear that back in the day, she was my fighter friend. Looking back, I don't know if it was even true. As a white guy, I probably have some issues that cause me to view all non-whites as my fighter friend. Not exactly cool on my end of things. Still, even if she wasn't actually my fighter friend, I was comforted by my belief that she was. She was cool and she had my back. If you don't yet have a fighter friend, perhaps you'll consider finding one. If you find one, I hope that she is as legit as S.
I can't remember if I expected this before I began my journey. Maybe I had assumed that everybody was blissfully happy 100% of the time, or maybe I hadn't given it any thought at all. On the other hand, it's also been a curious feeling to see friends that have succeeded. It's not that I set out with the idea that certain people I met would be failures. Rather, I neglected to remember that people can and usually do progress. Time does not stand still when I'm not around.
Meeting with K yesterday gave me this curious kind of feeling. For whatever reason, I expected her to be more like the woman I knew her to be many years ago. It's not as though she was a loser-like lump of a person back then, but I just didn't see this coming. Now, K is important, running the show, handling money, and TCBing. She is grown, independent, and, in a nutshell, not 23 anymore.
It's funny how people can fall into certain roles in life, and then struggle to be seen as anything other than that role filler. Maybe they are the nurturing, older sister, or maybe the goofball, screw-up, younger brother. Five years can go by where they do nothing to reinforce the idea of them in that role, but people may still see them that way nonetheless. I don't know if this type of behavior is damaging or just a harmless thing that happens naturally, but it's something of which I want to be more aware. Just as I want people to see me as I am presently rather than the perception they had of me twenty years ago, I want to view others, especially my friends, in their current state.